Stripes!

At the moment you are sipping $8/ bottle Pinot Griggio from a Dixie cup, adorned with sparkling patriotic flair, lying beach side as the sky fills with smoke from the extensive fire work display only Disney could afford, you realize this.

This weekend will end.

And so it did.

I had a wonderful time and soaked up the fresh feeling of nothingness every morning I arose, albeit at 8 am because someone did not reset my sons biological alarm clock. We stayed in our trusted family camper for the weekend at Disney's Ft. Wilderness campground, a tired yet familiar family endeavor. We rented a golf cart and mowed down unsuspecting Yankee's and streaked through the park with the elation of irresponsibility as we unleashed our freedom cry. Stars and stripes were waved, drunk patrons slurred in rhythm to the 'Star Spangled Banner' and the 'ooh's' and 'ahh's' erupted from the chorus of firework gazers.

We did some shopping at Downtown Disney. Wall E purchases were made. Nemo purchases were made. The wind carried with it the faint sound of a cash registers till each time I opened my wallet to remove another bill destined for Disney's glory.

I bought lunch for my family at the Rainforest Cafe, an unprecedented event. I made them all drink water and stole dinosaur nuggets from my son's kiddie plate because I am FANCY. Did I mention my Dixie Cup?

We watched 'Cars' at night under the open sky with a bag of $15 popcorn. We sang 'Happy Birthday' to a bunch of liars, because you want to tell me that 30 children that were staying in the campground ALL had the same birthday? You can't fool me, you birthday cheats, God is watching you.

The trip was an overall success. Brae managed to only partially severe his thumb in the door to the camper and I was only pulled over in the golf cart once, for suspected underage driving. My sprite-like appearance can be somewhat deceptive, sure. The reason for which I assume I was flagged down by the security officer and asked my age. She didn't think I looked old enough to drive the golf cart.

Would you like to know the age requirements for the golf cart?

REQUIREMENTS FOR DISNEY GOLF CART DRIVERS: Possession of a valid drivers licence.

That's a 9 year difference. That's a whole lotta difference there.

Good thing her attention was diverted from the golf carts rear, that damn Yankee couldn't hold still.



You thought I was only kidding about the flair? We take pride in embarrassing those we love.